Cath Sheard Art

Tag: family

  • Pōhutukawa – remembering

    In New Zealand we celebrate Matariki, and as part of that there are various ceremonies. Last night was centred on the star Pōhutukawa. The Pōhutukawa is also our Christmas tree and the tree of remembrance. People gather to honour and remember those who have died in the previous year.

    It’s eight months since Tony died. I think of him all the time, and talk about him with a few people. I had a lot of support in the years he was sick, and it was good to share that journey. I couldn’t have got through without the support, and know others facing the same situation appreciated my openness.

    But my grief? That’s mine. I share little bits of it, but mainly hold it close.

    Last night I messaged Tony’s daughter Yasmine to tell her I’d learnt about Pōhutukawa at work in a te reo Māori class. We talked about when she and Rory visited and I took a photo of the three generations together under the huge Pōhutukawa tree in our front yard. It’s good Yasmine and I can talk about Tony and keep the memories alive.

  • Thinky thoughts! #BlogJune 30

    I’ve been talking with my friend Penny tonight and, as often happens, the art chat circled back to the roots of our addictive natures, which for both of us led to morbid obesity. We also talked about symbolism in our art.

    Penny asked why the Patea freezing works and cool stores appear and reappear in my art, even when I’m seemingly concentrating on the Hokitika Gorge colours. It’s an interesting question.

    When I was sitting on Alan’s lounge floor in Hokitika contemplating the series of abstract mixed media pieces I was working on I suddenly realised I’d been loosely drawing the shape of the cool stores.

    I’m Patea born and bred and, at 56, have only lived away from here for a few years. I left at 18 and came back at 27. This is home. Growing up, the Freezing Works were central to our lives – Dad’s grocery business depended on them in some ways, friend’s parents worked there, friends expected to work there as generations before them had.

    The freezing works dominated the landscape as we drove into town from the south – a symbol of home in the same way the maunga is. The freezing works is long gone, demolished after a fire. The cool stores remain, long-abandoned and heavily graffitied.

    My addictive nature has its roots in pain essentially, according to Dr Gabor Máte in his book “In the realm of hungry ghosts; close encounters with addiction” and more recently the movie “The wisdom of trauma”. I’ve talked about some, but not all, of that pain before so let’s put that aside.

    For me the freezing works and cool stores symbolise home – not just my town or the family home – but Mum, Dad and my sister. They stand for love and safety or, to put it into an addiction/pain context, those buildings represent anti-pain. No wonder my mind pulls fragments of them out all the time…

  • Working in my lockdown journal

    Working in my lockdown journal

    All the pages have the same sub-structure to give the journal some uniformity; tissue paper, gesso, stamps/stencils or washi tape. I’m recording a combination of facts and feelings.

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  • It’s Christmas card time

    I am ambivalent about Christmas for all sorts of reasons. It’s a stark reminder of all the babies who couldn’t stay with me, and that my family all lives in other places. It makes me sad that so many people will be lonely. And I know domestic violence increases because of stress and financial pressure. Please be careful you don’t add pressure to people who are already feeling the strain…

    But, oh, how I love making Christmas cards. So far this year I’ve made just over 50, and there’s more to come. Paper, scissors, glitter, glue, embossing; I love it all 😉

    I make a card for each of my staff and peers, then write a short note about why I appreciate them and their particular skills. It’s a nice opportunity to think about each person as I sit, pen in hand, in front of the tv with Tony on the evenings.

    Here’s a sample of the kinds of cards I’ve done so far:

  • Calling the angels

    There’s a story behind tonight’s page, but it’s not my story to tell. Just know I believe those that have gone before watch over us, ‘angels’ if you will. This weekend I am calling on my angel mother to watch over my family.

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