Cath Sheard Art

Blog

  • 3 years ago

    Today it’s 3 years since I had weight loss surgery; C bypass to be precise, also called a mini bypass. It was meant to be RNY Bypass but I had so much internal scarring it couldn’t be done. My surgeon, Atul, prefers this operation but it’s not popular in NZ.

    My highest weight was 139.9kg and my lowest post surgery was 60kg, which wasn’t a good look. I got so low, not by trying, but because I got incredibly sick and was in and out of hospital including a brief stint on life support.

    I’m back to exactly where Atul (and the surgeons in New Plymouth who treated me) said I should be – 75kg. Some days my head tells me that the gain means I have failed and will get super fat again. But the sensible part of me knows that is not true. The reality is I was too thin, it didn’t look good especially for my face, and I felt frail.

    We’ve been talking about our mental wellbeing on a FB support group and I just commented that “All of us – fit or not, at goal or not, plastic surgery or not – have to find a place where our bodies & our heads are comfortable and that we can maintain without weight/fitness being the main focus of our lives – because that’s not really living”.

    At this weight I can eat fairly normally in a high protein, healthy fat & low carb way. I don’t exercise because of my physical limitations so can’t rely on that for extra control. And my weight is not the biggest thing in my life.

    I am incredibly grateful to Atul; I believe he saved my life and I continue to save it by doing the right things. I am still a food addict, and chocolate is my crack, but I have the tools to manage no. So grateful…

    At my lightest
    On the journey
    Pre-surgery
    August 2019

     

  • Body like a back road

    Yes, it’s more of the music I love – “Body like a back road” by Sam Hunt. This morning I’ve been doing some of the boring bits needed to get paintings ready for exhibiting, like painting the edges white. As I work, Tony’s been reading a book, Faith’s been sleeping/barking, and we’ve been listening to some of our favorite music on iTunes. The sun is out, the washing is drying in the back porch and (almost) all is right with the world!

    As I did this page I dropped the letter b from my Dy’s alphabet stamp set. We must have spent 20 minutes looking for it. I was beginning to think it had joined all the odd socks in the universe somewhere. But, no – it had somehow gone under the bottom drawer next to me. I have no idea how…

    Dylusions. Small journal. Paint: Vanilla custard, Rose Quartz, Slate grey. Stencils: Diamond in the rough, Star struck, Holes. Stamps: Dy’s alphabet. Other: Tim Holtz Tall Text stamps, Pitt big brush pen, Archival ink. Distress ink, Distress collage medium.

    back road 20190831

  • Beam me up

    As is often the case, I’ve turned to a song to say all the things I can’t find the words for. I love writing letters & blogging, and I’m a fairly slow deep thinker. Yet, when it comes to emotions, I’m suddenly voiceless.

    It’s the same for many addicts. Saying what’s in the deepest recesses of our hearts and minds is too hard, too scary, and makes us too vulnerable. On the flipside, that vulnerability is very healing. Through counselling, a lot of effort, and patient friends, I’ve healed a lot in the last year or so; healing that will help me maintain a healthy weight as I get further and further post weight loss surgery.

    This page uses the lyrics from P!nk’s song ‘Beam me up’ and refers to my angel babies, and also to missing Mum and Dad.

    beam 20190825

  • Picking up a dropped ball

    My dear art friend Theresa has had to step back from running the Colour Me Positive FB group for a bit, due to internet issues. Rather than see it die, I’ve agreed to take over for a bit, putting up the weekly challenges, and generally watching over things. I don’t believe in always picking up the ball when someone else drops it, but this time felt right. There are plenty of opportunities I say no to. 

    This week’s quote is from Frida Kahlo, one of my favourite artists, and an incredibly strong woman. I suggested of people want extra challenge they use hot Mexican orange and Kahlo style lush foliage. I used Dylusion’s paints and stencils for this one, and Distress Ink to edge the word strips.

    20190824

  • Acts of love

    I know if I’m to stay as healthy as possible, with all the challenges I have, taking care of myself properly is an act of love. Hating my body won’t work. I need to eat well, exercise as much as my disability allows, sleep enough and take time out to rest.
    Dylusions supplies: small journal. Paint: Black marble, Pomegranate seed, Cherry pie. Stencils: Small stars & Star struck. Stamps: Dy’s alphabet.
    Other: Tim Holtz tall letter stamps, Pitt big brush pen, white gel pen, Distress ink, Ranger Distress collage medium.

    love your body 20190818